All quotes
Every published quote, filterable by category, tone and mood.
800 results
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People do not deserve to have good writing, they are so pleased with bad. — Ralph Waldo Emerson（Attribution unverified） |
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Strange as it may seem, my life is based on a true story — Ashleigh Brilliant（Attribution unverified） |
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My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. — Mitch Hedberg（Attribution unverified） |
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Why have computers? Politicians are far more calculating. — Andre Brie（Attribution unverified） |
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Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well. — Mark Twain（Attribution unverified） |
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Cookbooks bear the same relation to real books that microwave food bears to your grandmother?s. — Andrei Codrescu（Attribution unverified） |
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Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it. — Lenny Bruce（Attribution unverified） |
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Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt. — Abraham Lincoln（Attribution unverified） |
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Automatic simply means that you can?t repair it yourself. — Frank Capra（Attribution unverified） |
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I don't know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn't. — Jules Renard（Attribution unverified） |
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Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. — Groucho Marx（Attribution unverified） |
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Sarcasm is the protest of the weak. — John Knowles（Attribution unverified） |
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I have never killed any one, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction. — Clarence Darrow（Attribution unverified） |
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I sometimes think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability. — Oscar Wilde（Attribution unverified） |
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The consumer isn't a moron; she is your wife. — David Ogilvy（Attribution unverified） |
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Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat. — Mark Twain（Attribution unverified） |
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Sarcasm is not the rapier of wit its wielders seem to believe it to be, but merely a club: it may, by dint of brute force, occasionally raise bruises, but it never cuts or pierces. — Rex Stout（Attribution unverified） |
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An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today. — Laurence J. Peter（Attribution unverified） |
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The 100% American is 99% idiot. — George Bernard Shaw（Attribution unverified） |
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History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. — Abba Eban（Attribution unverified） |