All quotes
Every published quote, filterable by category, tone and mood.
800 results
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I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it. — Groucho Marx（Attribution unverified） |
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No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend. — Groucho Marx（Attribution unverified） |
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Sarcasm is the language of people whose emotions are dying. — Barry Webster（Attribution unverified） |
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception. — Groucho Marx（Attribution unverified） |
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What I claim is to live to the full the contradiction of my time, which may well make sarcasm the condition of truth. — Roland Barthes（Attribution unverified） |
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He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. — Victor Borge（Attribution unverified） |
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It is said that truth comes from the mouths of fools and children: I wish every good mind which feels an inclination for satire would reflect that the finest satirist always has something of both in him. — Georg C. Lichtenberg（Attribution unverified） |
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You have delighted us long enough. — Jane Austen（Attribution unverified） |
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It's always darkest before it turns absolutely pitch black. — Paul Newman（Attribution unverified） |
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I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic. — Sarah Rees Brennan（Attribution unverified） |
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I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves. — Ludwig Wittgenstein（Attribution unverified） |
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The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. — George Bernard Shaw（Attribution unverified） |
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Never vote for the best candidate, vote for the one who will do the least harm. — Frank Dane（Attribution unverified） |
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My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I'm right. — Ashleigh Brilliant（Attribution unverified） |
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To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target — Ashleigh Brilliant（Attribution unverified） |
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He has no enemies, but he is intensely disliked by his friends. — Oscar Wilde（Attribution unverified） |
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Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar. — Drew Carey（Attribution unverified） |
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Satire is a sort of glass wherein beholders do generally discover everybody’s face but their own; which is the chief reason for that kind reception it meets with in the world, and that so very few are offended with it. — Jonathan Swift（Attribution unverified） |
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception. — Oscar Wilde（Attribution unverified） |
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All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy - and Jill a wealthy widow. — Evan Esar（Attribution unverified） |